The Catnip Thief: Revealed!

15 March 2013

“You’re not going to believe this, Flat Kathy,” declared Reggie, as she marched into the house from the garden, followed closely by a loudly purring Miss Tuffy-Cat. “I just caught the Catnip Thief!”

“Ohh! Really?” I exclaimed incredulously.

I clearly remembered the drama in the garden not so long ago, when Gilbert the Gnome, Miss Tuffy-Cat and I had sorrowfully surveyed the sad remains of her catnip. The Cat had been utterly distraught at the sight of those broken stems and bruised leaves. I still remembered her tearful wailing.

Now, Miss Tuffy-Cat was winding herself around Reggie’s legs, apparently trying to trip her up on her way to the kitchen – and her food bowl.

“Mrrreow, mrrrreow,” she purred, seductively.

Miss Tuffy-Cat has gotten into the catnip!
Miss Tuffy-Cat has gotten into the catnip!

“Had enough catnip,then?” said Reggie, looking sternly at the Cat, who was now glancing pointedly up and down between her empty food bowl and Reggie. Her message really couldn’t be much clearer.

“Are you saying…” I exclaimed, appalled, “that… that… Miss Tuffy-Cat was….”

“Yes,” nodded Reggie, playfully wagging her finger at the Cat in mock outrage. “I caught her sleeping – actually curled up and sleeping – right next to the catnip!”

“Noo!! I don’t believe it! How did she even get up into the herb barrel? I thought she can’t jump that high anymore?”

“Ja, well, that’s what we all thought, and perhaps that’s exactly what she wanted us to believe,” replied Reggie. “It seems…,” she bent down to scratch the purring Cat affectionately between the ears, “that we were wrong. She can still jump up into that barrel.”

Mrrrreow, mrrrreow, this is goooood 'nip!
Mrrrreow, mrrrreow, this is goooood ‘nip!

“So what did she do when she realised she’d been caught?”

“She quickly hopped down, and pretended that she hadn’t been canoodling with the catnip!”


Miss Tuffy-Cat increased the volume of her purring to fever pitch, as Reggie picked up her empty bowl and unscrewed the lid of her kibble-jar. The small hard pellets clattered into the bowl, and the Cat chirruped and mreowed in increasing agitation, as though she hadn’t been fed in weeks. Reggie put the bowl down on the floor, and gently ruffled the Cat’s fur.

“Mind you, it’s very possible that there was at least one other cat – if not more – nibbling from the catnip. I doubt that our little munchkin is the only catnip lover in the neighbourhood!”

Hello Mr Gilbert the Gnome - thank you for looking after my 'nip!
Hello Mr Gilbert the Gnome – thank you for looking after my ‘nip!

P.S. In all fairness to Miss Tuffy-Cat, I must admit that the photos in this post were staged – though her loving affection towards Her ‘Nip definitely isn’t staged. Reggie didn’t have the camera with her when she spotted the Cat among the catnip, so unfortunately we don’t have any conclusive photographic evidence.

When I confronted her later, Miss Tuffy-Cat declared huffily that she had merely been protecting her ‘nip against unwanted intruders. Well. Yes. Hm. … You be the judge.

4 thoughts on “The Catnip Thief: Revealed!

  1. I think Tuffy-cat was framed. There is no proof that she did it. You admit that Reggie PUT her in there for the photos. I rest my case.
    BTW — Miss Tuffy-cat is beautiful !


    1. Miss Tuffy-Cat started purring quite loudly, when I read your comment to her just now. She said, “Thank goodness, finally someone believes what I’ve been saying all along! I am innocent! And Sybil is a very observant young lady. I like her.”


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